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First Date Tips

First Date TipsA first date is usually full of excitement and possibility. After all, who knows what may follow?

First dates can also be nervous and awkward so be careful not to set your expectations too high. It can take time to get to know someone.

Here’s our advice on making the most of that first meeting.

Where to go

Choosing the right place to go is key to a successful date.

A candlelit dinner is the ultimate romantic night out and a great way to chat and relax together. On the other hand if you are really nervous you may prefer to avoid facing a heavy meal. A quiet drink in an atmospheric wine bar may be more relaxing and you can always decide to go on to eat together if the evening is going well.

A trip to the theatre or the cinema will limit conversation, but it can be nice to spend time with someone without feeling the need to fill all the silences, and afterwards you will have something to chat about.

Somewhere like a comedy club or a pub or bar with live music is a good balance between entertainment and the opportunity to chat.

You may even prefer to do an activity together – why not?

Activities can help to break the ice and, after all, shared interests will help a relationship in the long term.

You could choose something to reflect your personality or something that you think your date would enjoy – or you could go for an adventure and try something new together.

Check out our Date Ideas section for lots of dating suggestions.

What to wear

For many of us clothing is confidence. Dress yourself in the clothes that make you feel good.

If you are unsure about what to wear go for the mid ground and avoid anything too extreme. The most important thing is that you feel comfortable.

Make an effort to look nice but don’t overdo it. You’re not on parade.

Be Yourself

Do not try to be someone you are not.

There is no point. Your date needs to like you for who you are and if they don’t then they are the wrong person for you.

Having said that, do make an effort to be your best self. Which leads to...


Good manners can help to make a date go smoothly, even from something as simple as arriving on time.

So do be considerate and polite. But, remember, don’t turn yourself into someone you’re not.


Many people find it easy to kick off a conversation and get carried away together. Others are much less confident and can find it a nerve-racking experience.

Try to share your interests with your date. Tell them about your work, what you do in your spare time, music – whatever is important to you.

Remember also to get a balance between talking and listening.

We sometimes feel pressure to do all the talking. Actually people like to be listened to.

Be comfortable in the silences. A silence is only awkward if someone thinks it should be filled.

Try asking your date questions to find out about them, but be careful not to be too prying or intrusive.

It can be fun to ask about completely unimportant things – where would you like to go on holiday to next, who would you least like to be stuck on a desert island with, what’s your favourite television programme?

Remember that an awkward first date might mean you’re not right for each other... but it might also mean you really like each other and are both too nervous to relax.

Give things time.

And finally...

Don’t take things too seriously. Enjoy the date for itself rather than for what might follow.

Set out to have fun and to make the most of your time out and let the rest fall in to place.


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